Golu and newton

Golu is Greater dan Newton
Check dis!
Newton:Wen v Throw A Ball in d Air,y Does It Come Down?
Golu-der Is Nobody In d Air 2 Catch D Ball.

Golu Molu

Golu (molu se): Tu khali pet kitne Kele kha sakta hai?
Molu: 5.
Golu: Haste hue, are pagle pahle Kele khane ke bad tu khali pet kaha raha? matlab tu sirf ek hi Kela kha sakta hai..

Molu ghar aakar, apni biwi se: tu khali pet kitne kele kha sakti hai..
Biwi: 3.
Molu: dhhat tere ki, tu yadi 5 bolti to mast joke sunata :)

Golu and molu

Golu apni biwi ke sath ja raha tha ki Achanak use Molu mila jisko Police wale ne pakda hua tha..
..
..
Golu: kya hua.. ??
Molu: Maine apni biwi ko maar daala..
Golu: kitni saja hogi..
Molu: 6 hafte..
Itna sunte hi Golu ne police wale ki gun cheen kar apni biwi ko goli maar di..
..
..
Molu: Abe ye kya kiya tune... pehle poori baat to sun leta..
me kah raha tha ki 6 hafte baad mujhe fansi ho jayegi....
:) :)

Golu and sooraj

Golu ne ek bar majak majak me vrat rakh liya..

Golu( biwi se): dekho bhagyawan, suraj dooba ki nahi?

Biwi: Nahi

Thodi der bad ...
Golu: dkho suraj dooba ki nhai
Biwi: nahi

Golu: Lagta hai ye suraj mujhe sath lekar hi doobega :P

Golu ki ajib stithi

Golu Singh ki Biwi ko shadi ke 3 mahine bad hi bachcha paida ho gaya..

Golu: Yeh 3 mahine me bachcha kaise ho gaya?

Biwi: Apki shadi ko kitne mahine hue?
Golu: 3

Biwi: Aur meri shadi ko kitne hue?
Golu: 3

Biwi: Aur bachcha kitne mahine me hua?
Golu: 3

Biwi: To total 9 mahine ho gaye na..
Golu: Oye yar, mene to socha hi nhai... Kitna lamba time ho gaya hamari shadi ko :P

Golu after MBBS

After finishing MBBS Sardar started his practice.
He Checked 1st Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears with a Torch & Finally Said:
"Oye, hoye.. Torch is okay"

Calculator

Molu: papa, 4+3 kithne hai?
Golu: Ullu ke patthe..  gadhe..  idiot.. naalaayak..  besharam.. tujhe kuch nahi aathaa?
Jaa andhar se CALCULATOR le ke Aa.. 

Golu in Court

Judge: Don't U have shame? It is the 3rd time U R coming to court.
Golu to judge: U R coming daily, so don't U have shame?

Lunch Box

Why Santa opens his lunch box in the middle of the road???
Just 2 confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office....

Filmi Heroine

Ek din kisi heroine se milne producer aya..
Usne Ghar ke main hall me mataji ko paya..
jukh kar kiya namaste bola charan kaha hai lao..
paisa laya hu mataji baby ko jald bulao..

Mata ji boli..
kya bakta hai ullu ki dum, kya chadha rahi hai deshi.
beti ko bole mataji, najar chamgadag jaisi..
Bhauchakka ho gaya producer, bhed tab samajh aaya...
Bola sorry, makeup na tha isiliye pehchan na paya..

Kathni aur karni me antar

Golu aur padhai me thi bahut purani jung..
Golu ki jad buddhi se tha har master dang
Ek din master ne khunnas me daga ek sawal..
Kathni karni me antar ka do udaharn lal..
Golu ne apna dimag ka band pitara khola..
teacher ki or dekh kar sharmate hue bola..
Ji teacher ji is sawal ke ap hi hai jawab..
Kathni karni me antar ki sahi mishal hai aap..
Uniform me aane ka ham par hukm chalate ho..
Khud kapde badal badal kar hero ban kar aate ho...

Golu and Pravachan

Golu guruji ke pravachna sun kar aya aur ate hi apni biwi ko god mei utha liya ..
Patni boli : kya guru ji ne romance karne ke liye kaha hai...
Golu: Nahi pagli ...unhone kaha hai ki apne dukh khud uthao..

Kise uthayega

Ek dost doosre dost se : Man le tujhe raste mein 50 ka aur 100 ka note milega to tu kise uthayega.. ?
Doosra dost: isme poochne wali kya bat hai 100 ka hi uthaunga.. :)
Pehla Dost: Yeh kar di na bewakufo wali bat.. Dono note bhi to utha sakta hai na.. :P

Biwi ne bacha liya

Golu: Yar kal meri bus mein jeb kat gayi.... lekin meri biwi ne mujhe lutne se bacha liya..
Molu: Kyu, kya bhabhi ne jeb katre ko daboch liya..!!
Golu: Are nahi yar.. usne subah hi purse se sare paise nikal liye the.. !!

Guooonn, Guooonn

Talking about those days when there were no mosquito repellents and we had to spend sleepless nights. 


Sardarji was also experiencing the same every time. He tries to sleep, one mosquito comes and disturbs his sleep with a sound "guooonn, guooonn." 


He gets very irritated. He tries to cover his ear but the problem remains persistent. Ultimately he gets up and catches the mosquito in his hand. He is very kind and not for the blood shed but still wanted to take revenge. So he now starts singing a lullaby and says "so ja machchar, bete so ja". 


After some time he finds the mosquito falling into deep sleep in his hands. So he goes near it and says "Guoooonnnnn, guoooonnnnn." 

Urine Test

Two sardarjis were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like anything. 

So the other asked, "Why are you crying?" 

The first one replied, "I came here for blood test" 

Second one asked," So? Are you afraid?" 

First one replied, "No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger" Hearing this, the second one started crying. 

The first one was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?" 

The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."

Golu, Doctor and Key

Golu: Doctor! My Son swallowed a key
Doctor: When?Golu: 3 Months Ago
Dr: Wat were u doing till now?Golu: We were using duplicate key
Dr: So why did you come today?Golu: We lost the duplicate key!!

Golu in Airplane

Golu in airplane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: " Bombay .... Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent."
Golu: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay" 

Golu During interview

Golu attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Golu: If U give me the address I will go there sir.  :) 

Golu n teacher

Prinicipal :Late kyu aye ho..
Golu: Sir Bike kharab ho gayi thi..
Principal:bus mein nahi aa sakte the kya?
Golu: Sir meine bola tha par apki beti nahi mani... :) :P